April – umberel – Wonderful Yorkshire Dialect

It’s a poor heart ‘at doesn’t rejoice an welcome April. It isn’t only what it brings, but what it promises. Ov coorse ther’s allus some exceptions. A chap ‘at hasn’t a umberel an cant afford to buy one is badley off, but even then ther’s few things easier to forget. Awm rather forgetful mysen, but aw’ve nooaticed ‘at if yo goa aught wi one ‘at’s worth abaat tuppence hawpeny, yo’re sewer to bring it hooam safely, its nobbut when yo have a silk en ‘at’s worth summat like ten shillings ‘at yor mem’ry leaves yo.

Source

Hartley, John 1910 The original Clock Almanack in the Yorkshire Dialect

Volentines – February

"Ther did used to be a bit o’ fun for th young fowk on the 14^th when volentines use to be knockin abaat, but that’s noa longer th’ case. Pictur pooast cards killed th’ volentine craze an they’ve ommost had ther day. All romance seems to be deein aght nah days; fowk have to work soa hard for a livin ‘at they’ve noa time for sich foolishness as volentines. Even love has to tak a back seeat nah, an a lass thinks moor abaat what a chap haddles nor abat what he is. Wimmen are gettin moor independent an men indifferent. Lasses nah days had rayther goa an stand behind a caanter an sarve customers ner stop at hooam to help ther mother an leearn to bake an cook an keep a haase cleean an tidy... an then fowk say they wonder ha it is ‘at young chaps dooant seem i’ such a hurry to get wed as they used to be. An then tak th’ young chaps – what abaat them? What are they dooin? Fooitball i’ winter an cricket i’ summer is all they show onny interest in. Net ‘at aw’ve owt agean gams o’ that sooart, but one cannot help thinkin sometimes ‘at if they’d to give ther muscles a bit less wark an ther brains a bit moor they’d be better for it."

Just one more example of the wonderful use of the Yorkshire Dialect by John Hartley in his 1910 Clock Almanack.

Source

Hartley, John 1910 The original Clock Almanack in the Yorkshire Dialect

Trim awr sails and hooap for th’ best – wonderful Yorkshire dialect and storytelling

"A new year brings new responsibilities, - new joys an new sorrows, an we mun try to face em wi new strength. It’s like startin wi a new wife, - yo can nivver tell ha things will turn aght. Ther’s hooap one minnit an fear th’ next... Ther’s noa bigger mistak for a chap to mak nor to lay daan a hard an fast line for his futer conduct, for he’ll nivver be able to stick to it, an if he did he’d miss a deal moor nor he’d gain. When a captain starts on a voyage he knows his destination, but that’s abaat all. He cannot tell what storms he’ll meet, an ha far he’ll be driven aght ov his coorse, but he prepares as weel as he can for emergencies, an then trusts to luck. Well, let’s all trim awr sails an hooap for th’ best”

Just one example of the wonderful use of the Yorkshire Dialect by John Hartley in his 1910 Clock Almanack.

Source

Hartley, John 1910 The original Clock Almanack in the Yorkshire Dialect

Yorkshire Dialect – Rambling Remarks December

“Now all our neighbours’ chimneys smoke
And Christmas logs are burning,
With baked meats all their ovens’ choke,
And every spit is turning.

Outside the door let sorrow lie;
And if for cold it chance to die
We’ll tomb it in a Christmas Pie,
And evermore be merry”

“Ther’s one thing ‘at allus should be deead and buried deep at Kursmiss, an that’s selfishness. If yo want to mak sewer o’th’ merriest kursmiss yo ivver had, aw’ll tell yo ha to do to get it. Begin, as sooin as yo con, to gether up ivverything yo can think on 'at’ll be likely to afford onny enjoyment to th’ time, an when yo’ve getten it all piled in a lump begin to share it, reight an left, amang those abaat yo, an dooant be afeeard yo’ll be robbin yorsen, for th’ happier yo mak others an th’ happier yo’ll be yorsen. Its noa use deckin yor picter frames wi holly an mistletoe, an trimming th’ gas pipe wi fancy paper unless yo’ve some smiling faces an lovein hearts araand yo...


God bless yo all! An if it isn’t a Merry Kirsmiss, may it be a happy one.”



Source

John Hartley (1910) The Original Clock Almanack

Yorkshire Dialect – Rambling Remarks

November - Weather


“We’re all fond o’ tawkin abaat mists, fogs an dull days i’ November, as if ther’s nivver onny breet days; but aw’ve known money a November ‘at’s had days as breet an bonny as what ther’s been i’ April and May. But that’s just like us, if we find owt pleasant we accept it an forget it in a few baars, but if we meet owt ‘at’s disappointin or disagreeable, we nurse it, an harp on it, for months. It’s foolish we all know, for nubdy ‘at’s onny wit expects to find nowt but sunshine i’ this life. If we wor hawf as thankful for us blessins as we are discontented wi awr trubbles, we should find life better worth livin.”

Source

John Hartley (1910) The Original Clock Almanack

Whiskey and Worms – wonderful Yorkshire dialect and storytelling

“It matters nowt what yo say if fowk miss th’ point. It reminds me o’ what aw heard when aw wor at Keighley. Ther’d been a teetotal lecturer thear, an after tellin em what a fearful thing drink wor, an ha they wor shortenin ther days wi swallerin sich poison, he sed he’d give em a object lesson to prove it; soa he gate two glasses an filled one wi water an tother wi whisky, an then he tuk a worm aght ov a little box an dropt it into th’ glass o’ watter an it wor sooin wriggling abaat as lively as could be. “Nah,” he sed, “yo can see for yorsen ‘at watter willn’t hurt even a worm. But mark th’ difference,” an he tuk th’ worm aght o’th’ watter, an dropt it into th’ whiskey an in a minnit it wor deead. Ther wor a deal ov applause at this experiment, an as sooin as things quietened daan a woman at th’ far end o’th’ raam gate up an spake. “Awm glad aw coom to this lectur,” shoo sed, “for aw’ve been troubled wi them things i’ mi inside for monny a year, but aw know nah ha to get shut on them.” Soa yo see shoo’d mist th’ point o’th arguement.”

Just one example of the wonderful use of the Yorkshire Dialect by John Hartley in his 1910 Clock Almanack.

Source

Hartley, John 1910 The original Clock Almanack in the Yorkshire Dialect